Working in an office full of mostly 20-somethings (myself included), being a mom is not the norm. It is a item that the girls in my office have on their long term to do list but not really in sight, and that is totally fine. Motherhood is not something for everyone weather or not they are 20 or 30 or 50. And there are mom jokes out there that I can completely get behind, I mean they’re funny.
It is when I get lumped into a group that this 20-something population has created this “she used to be fun but now she is just a mom” group just kind of stings and goes to show that co-workers and even some friends really don’t know you at all or at least they stopped the moment you became a mom and that I think is sad.
As a part-time working mom I get a lot of “you’re lucky” comments from my co-workers and the thing is that I am really lucky, I will fully admit. But this kind of set up also means less pay and being on the “mommy track” in your career. So it is not without sacrifice that I do this.
And as a mom, I realize that much of my time is taken up by kids and everything that goes along with them. That is why Chester and I have worked really hard to try and balance a social life along with our kids by both including them in the things that we do and also finding the time and sending them away to have just the two of us time or adult social time. We were debating whether or not to have our annual Christmas white elephant party this year. It is a large undertaking to make our tiny apartment look presentable to our friends especially since the amount of baby items are basically increasing exponentially into every room of the house. It is something that we know is worth it to us for our friendships and mental well being to get this time with our friends. So again, when someone thinks that I have dismissed my “fun” life in the name of motherhood, I have to disagree and can’t help but be a little hurt that all of our efforts don’t come through to the onlooker.
Just because my fun-o-meter is not measured by how much alcohol I consumed the night before, doesn’t make me any less fun than I was. Yes I may be a bit less available, but with a little effort and understanding I am still the board game loving, pop culture missing, big bang girl that I ever was.
and a mom too ….